


(so close) can't breathe unless you do

by extasiswings



Series: playground love [3]
Category: 9-1-1 (TV)
Genre: (sort of), Canon Compliant, Established Relationship, Feelings, Flirting, M/M, Oral Sex, Smut
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-04-13
Updated: 2020-04-13
Packaged: 2021-03-02 00:34:17
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,654
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23626207
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/extasiswings/pseuds/extasiswings
Summary: “How was dinner?”“Um...mostly good.  A little weird at times.  Like when Maddie was talking about how pathetically, tragically single I am.”Buck regrets the admission when Eddie stills and pulls back.“You aren’t though,”  Eddie says.[Or, the one where they realize they might need to clarify some things]
Relationships: Evan "Buck" Buckley/Eddie Diaz (9-1-1 TV)
Series: playground love [3]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1696435
Comments: 23
Kudos: 829





	(so close) can't breathe unless you do

They don’t tell anyone.

It’s not that they’re hiding it—they often show up for shifts together, on a few occasions even wearing each other’s clothes, and Buck spends more time at Eddie’s with him and Christopher than he does at his own place. Buck realizes somewhat sheepishly upon reflection that, apart from being slightly more tactile, he and Eddie don’t act any differently at work than they did before they were together—but, the point is, they’re not hiding it. 

At the same time, Buck doesn’t mind that no one seems to have put it together. After months of feeling wretchedly exposed and vulnerable, with everyone seeking information about his health, his recovery, his mental state, making him feel like he wasn’t entitled to any sort of privacy, it’s nice to have something that’s just his. To be able to share a look with Eddie in the field when a woman asks if they’re single and bite back a laugh at the inside joke. To have space to breathe and grow and ease into a relationship without anyone offering unsolicited advice.

With Abby, he needed the advice, welcomed all the guidance he could get because he hadn’t had a real, adult relationship before. But Buck knows now—when he makes mistakes, it’s not going to be because he can’t focus on someone for longer than a night, and he’s prepared to fix them when they inevitably happen. He just wants the chance to prove it without anyone else hovering or worrying or expecting him to fail.

Of course, life doesn’t really care that much what he wants.

* * *

_Can I come over?_

_Maybe. This a booty call?_

Buck laughs and lets his head fall back against the driver’s seat as he looks at his phone. He is, in fact, already parked in front of Eddie’s, but it seemed polite to ask.

_What answer gets me through the door? Y/N?_

_Either. But Chris is asleep so...I wouldn’t say no._

He’s out of the car in an instant.

“That was fast,” Eddie teases as he opens the door.

“Guess you said the magic words.” Buck steps inside, curling his fingers in the front of Eddie’s shirt to pull him into a kiss as the door closes behind them.

Eddie hums and deepens the kiss—Buck readily melts into it, feeling the awkwardness of earlier in the evening leave him the more he’s touched.

“How was dinner?” Eddie asks absently as he turns his attention to Buck’s neck.

Buck huffs a laugh as he tips his head to give Eddie more access. “Um...mostly good. A little weird at times. Like when Maddie was talking about how pathetically, tragically single I am.”

He regrets the admission when Eddie stills and pulls back. 

“You aren’t though,” Eddie says.

Buck releases Eddie’s shirt in favor of smoothing his hands down Eddie’s chest and tugging him back in by his waistband.

“I know that, and you know that,” he replies, stealing another kiss. “But my sister doesn’t, and apparently neither does Chim. And I’m not entirely sure I believed her when she said she wasn’t trying to set me up with her friend Josh.”

“What did you say?”

“I went with it,” Buck replies. “Since you weren’t there to ask and we haven’t exactly talked about if we’re telling people, and, what was it you said back when we started this? Oh, right—it’s generally considered kind of shitty to out people to their coworkers without their permission?” 

Eddie makes a face and presses Buck back against the door. 

“You’re right,” he admits, nipping hard at the underside of Buck’s jaw. “And I appreciate it. But you should tell her. If you want.”

Buck laughs again as Eddie continues down his neck, knowing that he’s going to end up with at least one highly visible hickey and not having a single problem with that. His breath catches as he grinds their hips together, heat sparking in his blood.

“You know, if I tell her, that means everyone else will find out,” Buck points out, his eyes falling closed as one of his hands comes up to Eddie’s hair. “No more privacy.”

Eddie kisses him hard, pulling Buck with him down the hall to his bedroom. For a minute, Buck thinks that might be the end of the conversation as they get lost in hot kisses and maddening touches, as Eddie gets his hands under Buck’s shirt and tugs it off. But finally, Eddie falls back on his bed, sitting up on his elbows as his eyes flick over Buck’s body in the dark, and he says—

“I don’t want to be with anyone else, and I hate the idea of our friends setting you up with random strangers because they think you’re single. So, if that’s the tradeoff...fuck privacy.”

It’s nonchalant, but Buck can see the sincerity in Eddie’s eyes, the hint of fear mixed with determination. It strikes him that for all his own reasons for wanting to keep their relationship quiet, Eddie must have a million more—Christopher knows, that’s not an issue, but after Shannon—well, Buck can understand why Eddie might not want to subject himself to the scrutiny of everyone who knows them. 

“I could also just tell them not to set me up,” he replies. He joins Eddie on the bed, pressing him back against the pillows, kissing him slowly as he rucks up Eddie’s shirt. 

Eddie breaks the kiss and shakes his head, his own hands trailing down Buck’s back until they reach his ass.

“I’m not ashamed of this.”

Buck grins and bites Eddie’s bottom lip. 

“Didn’t think you were, baby, but feel free to reassure me some more.”

Eddie laughs and rolls them, pinning Buck’s hands above his head as he gets him on his back. 

“Baby?”

“Not working for you?”

“I didn’t say that.” 

“We don’t have to tell them everything, is all I meant,” Buck says as Eddie leans back to finish stripping his shirt the rest of the way off. He bites back a sound as Eddie sets his mouth to his collarbone, then moves lower. One of Eddie’s hands goes to the button of Buck’s jeans as his tongue traces the definition of Buck’s abs—Buck swears.

“I don’t mind,” Eddie replies, and Buck knows he’s trying to tease now, looking up at him with half-lidded eyes, not even bothering to hide the smirk curving his lips, to pretend he doesn’t know what effect he’s having on his boyfriend while continuing to carry on a conversation. “They’re our friends, they should know.”

“Okay, yeah,” Buck agrees, his voice going somewhat strangled as Eddie unzips his jeans and tugs them down. “Fuck privacy, right?”

“I’d rather fuck you.” Eddie nips at Buck’s hip, making him jerk, and Buck narrows his eyes at the tease.

“I’m not stopping you.” He’s flushed all over, hard and aching, and bites his lip hard when Eddie pushes his boxers down, freeing his cock.

“Well, in that case—” Eddie doesn’t hesitate before taking him in his mouth, his eyes hot, pupils blown wide. Buck twists his fingers in the sheets at his sides, knowing better than to reach for him. Eddie hums in approval, the vibrations making Buck swear again, then swirls his tongue around the head of Buck’s cock before sucking lightly at the tip. The next moment, he pauses, then takes as much as he can without warning.

Buck turns his head, biting the pillow to muffle his sounds as Eddie winds him up higher and higher. It’s not exactly why he came over, but he sure as hell isn’t going to complain. 

Eddie hums again and sucks and Buck’s hips arch unconsciously before Eddie pins them back to the mattress with his forearm. Pleasure twists his stomach, his head fogging over, dizzy and drowning in sensation. Part of him wants to stop as he skitters toward the edge, to beg for Eddie’s fingers, to be opened up and fucked like Eddie teased. But he’s too far gone for that—it takes very little else for his vision to go white, for him to muffle a shout into the pillow as he spills into Eddie’s mouth.

“Fuck,” Buck breathes, coming back down to Eddie kissing back up his body. As soon as he’s close enough, Buck kisses him, having no qualms about licking into his mouth and undoing his pants. Eddie gasps into the kiss as Buck’s hand dips below his waistband, wrapping around Eddie’s cock and stroking just the way he likes. Eddie bites down on Buck’s shoulder when he comes, not hard enough to break the skin, but definitely enough for Buck to feel it and shiver. 

They stumble into the shower to rinse off after, the mood shifting from fierce and wanting to slow and tender, all gentle kisses and soft touches. Buck steals a pair of sweats from the dresser later—with the risk of a kid running in when the morning comes, they have to take a little care—but neither of them bother finding clean shirts. Eddie slings an arm over Buck’s waist as they settle back in bed, chest pressed to his back. When Eddie drops a kiss to Buck’s shoulder, to the lingering marks there, Buck sighs and leans back into it. 

“So...we’re really going to tell people, huh?” Buck asks quietly, more settled with the idea than he was before. 

“Might as well,” Eddie says. “Rip the bandaid off.”

“Maddie’s going to kill me when she finds out how long it’s been,” Buck jokes.

“You can blame me.”

“Well, that’s a given. She likes you, she’ll forgive easily.”

Eddie laughs and squeezes Buck’s waist. “Stop worrying and go to sleep.”

A pause, then— “Hey, Eddie?”

“Yeah?”

Buck bites back a smile. “I really like you.”

He feels Eddie’s own smile against his neck. 

“I really like you, too.”

**Author's Note:**

> Title from "Closer" by Josef Salvat.


End file.
